Last night CBS aired the 1964 (not quite claymation, kinda cartoon) Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I have not watched this in a long time and it seems as if there are a lot of things I missed as a kid and are interesting to dissect as an adult…
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Santa is an ass and just plain mean to Rudolph; I think he’s a nose-ist. Mrs. Claus is the obvious underlying cause to obesity in the U.S. She kept yelling at Santa, “Who likes a skinny Santa? Eat! Eat!” Then Donner, the coach of the reindeer fawns, was just plain mean and sexist/nose-ist. He reminded me of the character Billy Bob Thornton plays in Mr. Woodcock. And all the female reindeer need to burn their bras and stand up to the males; “man’s work.” Pshaw. There was also a very effeminate elf…very sensitive boy who worked with the misfit toys. And all those misfit toys…where to begin with their issues. I think most of them have a case to sue their manufacturer: a train with square wheels? A “Charlie” in the box? A cowboy riding an ostrich? Sounds like malpractice all the way. I wish Johnny Cochrane was still around. I am sure there would be some sort of Chewbacca defense in the making.
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